WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - Despite his displeasure with how he has been portrayed by Alec Baldwin, Donald Trump says he actually likes 'Saturday Night Live' and is a big fan. As a matter of fact, the president-elect just announced that when he delivers his very first State of the Union Address (SOTU), it…

‘They’ve been getting on like a house on fire,’ said the anonymous member of Johnson’s staff. ‘It’s like listening to a couple of teenage girls talking. They share how they maintain their luxurious heads of hair and then they giggle like schoolgirls as they randomly spout out their favourite racial slurs.’

Diverging somewhat from the non-partisian Congressional Budget Office's analysis of the bill, which projected it would balloon the nation's deficit by $1.4 trillion within the first 10 years of its implementation while having an unknown effect on job growth, the WHBO's assessment was considerably more favorable of the legislation.

Thirty-six years ago today my favorite progressive was murdered. John Winston Lennon was the kind of person who wasn't afraid to take off his clothes and stand up for what he thought was right. I think more progressives ought to follow his lead. Enough with all this pearl clutching and fainting, my fellow Americans, let's see what you've got there—and there, too..

Due to its mammoth nature it is being dubbed ‘Ultimate Weapon’ and, according to some scholars, a very similar creature was described in Mayan scripture.

Hollywood, CA – (satireworld.com)
Hoping to cash in on the successful match-up of actor Johnny Depp and the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, Walt Disney Pictures announced the start of filming for the controversial movie biography of Subway pitchman Jared Fogle with Depp starring as the beleaguered spokesperson now serving 18 years in prison for child molestation.

The two sides will take the field and engage each other in a horrific scene of carnage to settle once and for all which of them is keeper of the ultimate truth.

NEW YORK, New York (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - During a live television discussion on undocumented immigrants, conservative author Ann Coulter referred to Asian Americans as "Mandarin." Her fellow panelist on the Chris Matthews show corrected her and said they are called "Asian Americans," but Coulter insisted it was the correct term and refused to…

(satireworld.com) Walter Bucket Presents True Facts
1. Although General Patton’s last words were reportedly, “This is a hell of a way to die”, a family member close to the bed asked “What do you see, General?” as he passed away, he whispered “Assholes & Elbows… Assholes & Elbows!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Adobo Chronicles, Washington Bureau) - It was just a matter of time. Ruth Bader Ginsburg has stepped down from the U.S. Supreme Court, leaving two vacancies that incoming President Donald Trump will be filling. In July, Ginsburg told the New York Times that if Trump is elected president, she would abandon the U.S. for…

St. Louis, MO – (SatireWorld.com)

The Anheuser-Busch corporation notified stockholders that a recent analysis of some Budweiser products showed a high percentage of horse meat in the company’s mascot and world-famous team of Clydesdales.

'Twas the night before Xmas and Hillie was drunk, while Huma was belching and shaving her skunk. Fat Rosie O'Donnell was cleaning a rug, not thinking of Donald and his fugly mug.

The light bulbs use a newly invented compound called bullesium which allows the bulbs to illuminate a room faster and brighter than any previous energy saver.

Detroit MI- (satireworld.com)
Democratic National Cars (DNC) announced their new line-up of blue automobiles for 2018, commencing with the re-engineered 2018 Pelosi to be manufactured in the USA.

HONOLULU, Hawaii  (The Adobo Chronicles, Honolulu Bureau) - Presumptive Republican Presidential Nominee Donald Trump today trashed the Texas-based musical group Dixie Chicks and called the ladies "chicken." The trio opened their DCX MMXVI World Tour in Cincinnati yesterday by performing their 1999 hit "Goodbye Earl" against a backdrop showing Trump with devil horns, mustache and beard. These…

SILICON VALLEY, California (The Adobo Chronicles, San Jose Bureau) - Gone are the glory days of Mocha Uson, Thinking Pinoy and other major major bloggers. Their millions of followers will now be reduced to a maximum of 500 followers. Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg told The Adobo Chronicles that beginning January 1, 2018, the social media giant will impose…